I still get so pissed off remembering the dozens of people who would tell me “Oh, well your ADHD will just go away as soon as you’re an adult, and its not like its a REAL mental problem” bitch I’m almost 19 and so far all its done is gotten worse like what did you expect me to magically become a perfect adult upon my 18th birthday
like i constantly forget to perform basic human functions and not on the level of “oh, you just need reminders” but more on the level of “if i didnt have my sister i would forget to eat for like, a week and then probably die”
Yeah. ADHD doesn’t go away when you grow up, more than half of adults diagnosed as children still meet the diagnostic criteria. Those who don’t still have a lot of ADHD traits, they just aren’t substantially impaired by them anymore, possibly because they’ve found jobs that suit them.
But even if ADHD did disappear entirely the day you turn 18, you would not magically gain the multitude of skills you missed out on growing up. It wouldn’t erase the memories of failure and shame. Don’t fucking ignore a child’s disability just because you think it’s going to go away eventually.
I’m 36 years old, and even though I was diagnosed at age THREE, I’m only now actually dealing with it instead of just sort of throwing drugs at it and telling myself I’ll do better next time. Why now? Because I had a mental breakdown, quit my career, and didn’t get out of bed for a year. So, yeah. It’s not going to go away. It’s going to get better on it’s own. Don’t wait till your 30’s to start learning how to live with it 😉
My Mom suspects she has it but has never been formally diagnosed. She used to beat herself up all the time for expressing common ADHD traits and is only now being less hard on herself about them. A lot of adult women are in that same category: They’re undiagnosed and just see themselves as “forgetful” or “bad mothers.” The way we as a society forget about adults with ADHD affects the lives of real people and it sucks.
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